Learn to be comfortable in your own skin…
None of us are perfect. Zil. Zilch. Zero. I know, I know this first point is ridiculously hard at times for everyone; but first and foremost is to be happy in yourself. You can’t expect life to flow if you’re stuck in a rut in yourself.
We all have flaws and the sooner we realise and accept this, the better. For example: I have stretch marks on my sass ass, I have ugly long toes/ feet, my laugh totally sounds like Marj simpson’s first time going mad on a helium balloon, (I’m not kidding) I like making weird faces & will always have some ladish banter and joke about anything.. I fill up about 100 glasses of whatever and leave them everywhere.. I either go full blown lovely and attentive or cold & distant in a heartbeat, I always want to eat out at nice places and I send far too many emojis/gifs for a 24 year old! So yeah.. some of my flaws- If I can put some of my cringe (af) flaws out there, you can at least tell to yourself it’s okay to have your own flaws.
Sunday morning my worst ‘superficial’ scare had happened.. My tooth (crown/fake) pretty much fell out after a crunch noise this morning.. thought I was still in my nightmare when it actually came out after eating steak (which I had previously)- I was completely horrified. I knew that (hopefully not) it would be painful to put back in and most importantly how it made me feel. But for a couple of tests were a test. Having no front tooth and still going out etc made me so insecure, until I hung out with my friend andreas yesterday along with my brother and both made me feel beautiful and said to just be comfortable and who cares. Like literally who cares.. To be comfortable in my own skin and not worry what others will say/think can be hard for all of us as we know this generation is completely shallow and judgemental. I had an accident couple of years ago, fell flat on my face in my favourite bar; (cringe- I know) after the horrific fall I ended up in hospital.. So for a few days, meetings with PR’s, an event and going out.. I was forced to be comfortable in my own skin and of course embrace the hillbilly look… (E! New :xtineloves goes hillybilly -ha)
But seriously, no matter what, please accept just your background, your body, background, everything- the whole lot (!) Once you’ve accepted all of this, you’ll begin to love yourself for who you are.
It’s a killer and will always be if you aren’t comfortable in your own skin. It kills your soul, who you are and your self confidence and esteem will spiral down and it will affect other areas of your life. Be bold, sassy and positive (!) If I can embrace my toothless situation, you can embrace what you need to…. Learning to be comfortable will seriously make you feel a million times better!
You can’t expect others to respect and love you for you, if you don’t Felicia.. Can I get an A-men.
Appreciate what you have now and never compare yourself to others!
With technology becoming an ‘essential’ in everyones life, social media can be the epitome of negative thoughts.. Shit thoughts. I used to think for most of my life, “why can’t I have her life, from partner to career” I wish I had it. But now, this year, it completely changed, I am forever grateful and will give all the money I have to keep whatever is in my life. I adore my bf, bffs, bro, family, work friends. the lot- adore.
Avid users tend to look away from their own self and look at other people lives. It’s enviable, but, it’s completely soul destroying. Whether the comparison comes from social media or not, looking outside will not make yours any better. We all have amazing-ness in our lives- You may look outside- but, you’ll never know if it’s really that perfect. The grass isn’t greener on the other side; it may seem so, but it doesn’t mean it truly is…You just need to water yours- like everyday Felicia! You may give up what you don’t pay attention now and one day you’ll totally regret it.
Someone may look at your life and wish they had your partner, career, position in life, opportunities etc- while you’re wishing you had someone else’s.. So appreciate the good and the bad!
Appreciate what life offers you. A good job? appreciate. A good partner? appreciate. A good family? appreciate. Support? appreciate. Appreciate it all! A good way to start appreciating is to think life without it.. Use that feeling to motivate yourself to appreciate it.
Let go of control…
Life won’t always pan out the way you want it to, (ugh, why not I hear you cry) Ha, but you can’t go around controlling all situations in life and can’t go controlling people.
Once you learn to that obstacles will occur and not everything will go your way, you’ll feel more free! When you feel free, you’ll enable the positives to come into your life. You just have to accept that you’ll never be able to control people, situations, etc! You’ll run around aimlessly worrying about the unnecessary. Learn to let go of control and you’ll notice the weight off your shoulders will change into a positive feel and enforce positive vibes everywhere (insert dancing red emoji)..
I remember my friends going on a rant about how events never went their way because of how people treated it, how they were annoyed at their life for not going their way that particular week. Don’t fret the small stuff, change your mindset, be more positive and you’ll learn why certain situations had to happen. You can’t control what’s happening in life, but you can control your emotions.
Live in the moment-
I remember when one of my best friends, well she was almost like a sister to me, had sadly passed away last summer. I was hurt. I just remembered the soul she was- she always I mean always lived in the moment- the whole #teamnosleep, focusing on the now and loving life for what it is.. I have never met a more happy go lucky, ‘live in the moment’ person- ever. She taught me so much and I am forever grateful God gave me that three year solid friendship. I know I will never have a friendship exactly like that again- someone who is always there, be a rock through the lows, and help you appreciate the ‘live in the moment’ vibe.
I have learnt the moment you have now will never come again. Don’t always get caught up thinking the past, or worse the future. when you live in the moment you forget about the past and present, so try it. You’ll never get 60 seconds back worrying, so enjoy stuffing your face with pizza, or the people in front of you hugs them tell them you appreciate them, enjoy what’s happening in life or just the birds singing in the morning! Simple things. Seize that moment- don’t get stuck in a ridiculous rut by placing your mind in the future or past.
Stop over analzying..
I over analyse everything, I mean, I used to over analyse everything- from how a person said something, to how many x’s they’ve added to a text, their tone of voice, our conversation, little jokes.. just the whole lot, from partner to family.. It crushed me hard and I would always end up in an emotional state up there. Now, I have learned to stop doing that.
This is what a lot of us do — over analyzing things from our looks, to our relationships with people, to hows our career going, what he or said said and finances etc.. The lot.
Overanalyzing is dwelling on the thought about something (small or big), thinking about it over and over, constantly trying to dig deeper and deeper. If you think about it, we never actually get an answer but a set of cruel weird worries.
It’s unequivocally annoying.
In order to avoid overanalyzing, we need to be more outspoken. Use your voice girl! Do it today with people around us- don’t let thoughts linger in your mind and gives negative vibes.